Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Faking It.

No matter how hard I try, I am starting to realize that I can't please everybody all of the time. It's a very tough lesson to learn (especially for a woman) but it's something that I am trying, trying to pass onto my daughters so they are saved from a lifetime of heartache.
Okay. So maybe I'm being a little dramatic.
I have realized that I don't want my girls to grow up thinking that they have to spend their lifetimes pleasing other people. I mean, we aren't here for all that long are we? Why spend it doing what we think other people think we should do? Why don't we spend our time doing things that feed and nourish our spirits and souls? I guess the biggest challenge to that is figuring out what it is that makes us feel whole and complete.
I am struggling to balance making a paycheque and feeling fulfilled by my career. It's just not happening....but I am not sure that it really does for many women? How am I supposed to pass along the message to my girls if the message is isn't being delivered in full, to me? Sometimes, I feel as lost as my 18 year-old trying to figure out what she wants out of life and I am 39!!
While I am searching the abyss for my career happiness, I will continue to learn my skill and collect my paycheque. And even though I am struggling to find inner peace and tranquility with my own job, I guess I can "fake it 'til I make it" for my girls' sake.

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